It was 2020, when my best friend introduced me to The Life Coach School Podcast. In the midst of a pandemic, feeling overwhelmed and anxious, I decided why not? I’ll just listen to this while I do the dishes.
Once I started, I couldn’t stop listening. I had my airpods in at every moment of the day. Pretending to listen to my children as they take turn playing, I devoured each episode as if someone were paying me money to listen. I was hooked. It’s odd it’s not like it was cutting edge, brand new concepts that I’ve never heard before. However, I think that it was at this point in my life that I was finally ready to listen.
What is Life Coaching?
Life Coaching is a practice where we bring awareness to our thoughts. Our thoughts are what create our feelings. Our feelings are what drive our actions, which ultimately create the results in our lives.
Instead of looking to put a bandaid on symptoms, we look at the root cause, which is our thoughts. Our thoughts are just sentences in our minds, but they are so powerful. These thoughts are what shape our beliefs about who we are and the world around us. It is the foundation of our mindset.
In this article published by Stanford, they spoke to Dr. Jacob Towery, adjunct clinical instructor in the department of psychiatry, about how your mindset can affect everything from your health, stress levels and resilience in overcoming life’s challenges.
As a life coach, I help my clients examine their current situations and help pinpoint where they would like to see some change. We work together to uncover what their current thoughts are and whether it serves them or not. Then, I help them see what’s possible and they decide what changes they want to implement and move forward with in order to create the life they want to live, intentionally and authentically.
And that’s the thing, you do have to do the work. This isn’t some diet bar plan, where if you eat a certain number of bars, you will lose 10 pounds. With life coaching, you can’t fake your way through. You only get what you put into it. If you choose not to be vulnerable and share the truth, then you won’t see the full picture. It’s as if your coach holds up a mirror to you and there’s no where to hide. I’m not going to lie when you first start life coaching, it’s a lot. You will experience a full range of emotions – discomfort, pain, shame, joy, etc. I used to complain to my husband “why am I doing this to myself?” But, I realized in order to truly live my life to the fullest, I needed to be willing to experience and feel every range of emotion.
My 5 Key Takeaways from Life Coaching
- Self Confidence
Most people think that you have to have accomplished or done the thing before and therefore you have confidence. However, self-confidence is simply the notion of trusting yourself. Trusting that you will be able to figure it out. You can get through it. You can do it. Having your own back. This is not based off of validation that you get outside. This is remembering that you’re worthy from the day you were born and your worth is not defined by anything else. You have everything that you will ever need in you. You just have to believe that and that’s when your self confidence will come.
2. Taking Responsibility
Do you feel like life is happening to you? Everything is out of your control. People are doing this to you. I think we all have a hard time taking responsibility. We like to say things like “but, he made me feel this way” The fact is no other person can make you feel a certain way. It is your thoughts that control your feelings. So when someone does something, it’s the way you are interpreting it and accepting it that drives your feelings. Trust me, this one is a hard one. It seems so simple in concept and you probably think “I always take responsibility!” However, this is a tough one for a lot of people. I help enable my clients see the facts and then decide from there how they want to move forward. When you finally take responsibility for your actions, you are taking your power back. You are empowering yourself.
3. Boundaries
I used to think of boundaries as being selfish or not kind. It’s mean. However, now I see that boundaries are the most loving thing that you can do for yourself and for the people around you. Boundaries allow you to establish what you need and want. If the other individual loves and respects you, it should be easy for them to accept the boundaries that you have set. However, if they do not respect your boundaries, then that’s okay too! Then, it would be up to you to decide whether you want to continue investing in your relationship with this person when they clearly do not have mutual respect for you.
4. Manuals
This is a concept that we have instruction manuals for everyone we encounter in our lives. We have certain expectations and when it doesn’t unfold in that exact way, we are disappointed or upset. When we can finally see that every individual has their own manual for themselves and you cannot write one for that individual. There’s so much freedom to accept who they are and who you are. You cannot control anyone except for yourself. The perfect example of this is parents and children. As much as a parent would like their child to follow the manual as the parent has written, that’s definitely not how it goes. Once we accept that we can’t control others and what they do or think, it gives you so much space to allow the acceptance of that person and their behaviors. If you feel resentful in a relationship, it’s time to take a closer look and see if you have a manual for how that person should behave and treat you.
5. Thought Downloads
A thought download is simply sitting down and writing anything and everything that comes to mind without filtering or judgement. Just write. Something amazing happens when you put pen to paper and turn your thoughts into words on a page. It’s so cathartic. This practice alone is so eye opening. I incorporate this into my daily routine. Sometimes things seems so large and overwhelming in your head, but when you start writing it down on paper, it makes it more manageable.
Make the Investment
In conclusion, Life Coaching is an investment in yourself. It’s an investment in your mental health and well being. It’s an investment in your future and can help you achieve your goals in a much shorter timeframe. Once you are able to manage your mind, you just free up that much mental space for other things – creativity, work, building wealth, nurturing relationships, etc.
I am so grateful to my past self who decided to dive into Life Coaching. Even my husband who was the most skeptical of all is now a hardcore believer. He has seen how much I’ve grown and how much he’s grown. From our life coaching journey alone, we have mended relationships, made smart financial investments and purchases and have learned to be intentional with our time. Life Coaching is the gift that keeps on giving. Ultimately, I just feel so much more lighter and less anxious. I no longer indulge in worrying and stressing. It’s as if Life Coaching gave me the gift of quality time. I’ve spent a lot of money on Life Coaching and I have never once regretted it. So, what are you waiting for? Instead of bitcoin, I highly recommend investing in some Life Coaching and changing your life.
